Dear Erin, I forgive you…
Talking self love, well, forgiveness can be a MASSIVE part of it. When we are carrying resentment or anger, that is a weight that takes energy to carry. It can be a massive energy drain. Something that is constantly pulling us down and giving us a negative energy. I want to be clear before we get too much further though what forgiveness is and what it is not.
Forgiveness is:
an intentional decision to let go of resentment and anger
giving up any claim to be compensated for the hurt or loss we have suffered
a conscious, deliberate decision to release feelings of upset or vengeance toward whoever has harmed you, whether they actually deserve your forgiveness or not
Forgiveness is not:
saying what happened didn’t matter or minimising the hurt it caused
forgetting
saying that what happened was ok
Forgiveness may involve repairing a relationship, but it doesn’t have to. Though forgiveness can help repair a damaged relationship, it doesn’t mean you have to reconcile with the person who harmed you, or release them from legal accountability. It also doesn’t unfortunately mean that there won’t be consequences of the actions that will still have to be lived out.
I have had to consciously forgive people in the past. I remember talking to one of my friends many years back about how I didnt know how to forgive someone in my life, but I wanted to. It didn’t happen overnight, it took time, but eventually I got there. Another time it was me that needed forgiveness. That took a long time because “I knew better” but didn;t act better.
Recently I have been exploring this journey of having to forgive myself, and my body. I’ve written myself a number of letters of forgiveness over the last few years. Here is one. Maybe this is the nudge you need to write your own letter of forgiveness to someone you feel has wronged you, even if that someone is you. You don’t have to show it to them. You don’t even need to tell them anything. This is just about you releasing the anger, the hurt, the weight so you can move toward living life with joy.
Dear Erin
Thank you for taking on this journey. I just know that greater peace and security and freedom will be yours as you continue to travel it!!!
I forgive you for wearing your masks. For feeling like you couldn’t put them down. I’m so proud of you for being willing to give them up. You are so brave.
I forgive you for feeling that you’re not good enough. For feeling like you had to earn love and acceptance. I’m so excited you’re learning that your value doesn’t change whether you do or don’t do the things. Keep exploring this.
I forgive your for judging yourself harshly. For not being willing to accept anything less than perfection. You would say perfection is boring, and anyone else who seemed perfect would be intimidating. Thank you for starting to embrace your flaws. It is the imperfections that make you interesting and relatable.
I forgive you for not feeling worthy of charging people for your services. I know this self love journey will help you see that other people do value your time and knowledge and skills and experience and are willing to pay for that.
I forgive you for not knowing better, not doing better with the girls. You were doing the best you could, and I acknowledge you for stepping up and trying to get to the root of the problem rather than just polish it up on the surface. It takes courage to lean into the discomfort and go deep!
You deserve to live a fulfilling life and I’m committed that you get that. A life of flow and ease, not just struggle and striving. I am here to love you, to accept you adn to support you.
Always yours
Erin xxx
If this resonates with you, and you’d like to explore more on the journey of self love, check out my 14 days of self love guide here.
